Crickets

I thought 2008 was a tough year. And it was. To be fair, there were some redeeming moments, but overall it was a year of facing some giants and forging through challenges that seemed impossible. So at the dawn of 2009, I was giddy about a new start. I made a long, long list of things that would be different in 2009. My control issues started taking over (again) and I started trying to drum up the best dang year ever.

So guess where my attempts at controlling and fixing life landed me. In the middle of another hard year, filled with different challenges. Time and time again, I have prayed…”God, is there something I’m missing here?? Are you asking me to ‘do’ something and I’m just not hearing it?” And you know what I hear in response?

*Crickets*

Time and time again, silence has set in like a cold winter snow. It covers everything I can see with an awareness that it’s not about what I can see. Truth… faith…. love… is once again not emerging from the things that scream for my attention. And I know this isn’t breaking news… but it has hit me all over again during the past few weeks.

So instead of assuming that God is “MIA” when all I hear is crickets in the middle of a dark night, I’m starting to realize that the silence really is a gift. Not one of the lame gifts we get in the mail from the insurance company (although I’ll admit, that was my first impression).

Silence has, in recent weeks, allowed me the rare chance to tune out all outward expectations – mine and anyone else’s – and look at life from the inside out. Silence forces me to tune my ear – or rather my heavy heart – to the things that aren’t things. Silence brings into keen focus the Voice of the only One whose whisper is more powerful and life-changing than a thousand voices.  For that, I’m eternally grateful.

This year, moments of silence have been my salvation from despair. Because it is in silence that the music of Heaven can be unleashed in the depths of us.  In our journey of faith, just as in all masterpieces, there is really is music in the pause.

5 thoughts on “Crickets

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  1. Yes indeed EM… sometimes our greatest gift in this hectic and unpredictable world is a golden silent moment….. I hear God in the silence and so do you!!!!
    Love You!!!! Ban-Joey

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  2. When reading this, it made me think of what our pastor has been teaching on the last few Sundays which asks the question, why does bad things happen to good people. I’ve personally received a blessing out of it. Sometimes we need the silent times to reflect. Personally I don’t think we will ever truly understand the vastness of our God & the things that happen during our earthly live journeys.
    Thanks so much for all you do & for baring your heart & soul to us. You & your family are in my constant prayers…with much love.

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  3. Hi EM, No doubt the sound of silence is really necesary in certain moments of our life. There is some people that can’t bear this sound. For them the silence shouts and bother.
    But the sound is necesary for hearing us and more important for hearing God talking to us.
    Take this silence to get taste of the voice of your husband and sons, the unique voices that can add to your silence, the best crickets in your night.
    I wish you to enjoy that silence. Taste it! And hope the avatar for the next time could be a 5 pentagram sheet. Cause for me the sound of the GVB is the nearest thing to silence I can find.
    Lot of hugs for you and your family!!

    David

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  4. I got to know my *crickets* by name . . . each one of them. Every time I cried out, the silence returned. Looking back, I think what sounded like silence and what looked like inactivity on God’s part was Him allowing me a priceless opportunity to listen to “the still small voice” and dive deeper into the meaning of true faith. God never stops moving but He does ask us to. Ask God to help you learn to love the silence and anticipate/expect/buckle up for those “great and unsearchable things that you do not know” to show up! The return on silence is priceless if we approach it with a fresh faith that isn’t scared to be still. What a great post. I keep saying I’m going to blog – I will in 2010! My resolution! You inspire me!

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  5. Justice will dwell in the desert and righteosness live in the fertile field.
    The fruit of righeousness will be peace;
    the effect of righteousness wil be quietness and confidence forever.
    My people will live in peaceful dwelling places, in secure homes, in undisturbed places of rest.
    Isaiah 32:16-18
    Love you, Em
    Carol

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